Marriage THEN Baby is the “Beyonce Way?”

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Last night, Beyonce stole the show at the VMAs with a huge announcement: she and husband Jay-Z are expecting their first child. After a passionate performance, Bey dropped the mic “Randy Watson & Sexual Chocolate” style  opened up her shiny, sequined jacket, did a diva-pose and rubbed her emerging baby bump glowingly. An ending to a performance, which I’m sure will go down in the annals of pop culture history.

What will also go down in history, I suppose, is the way Beyonce is choosing to bring her and Jay-Z’s seed into the world. Amidst the excitement, shock and awe of her very public announcement, people of Facebook and the Twitterverse noted, with some admiration, that Bey and J did it “right:” dating, marriage, THEN baby. Something I happen to agree with. Throughout the night I saw some tweeting and re-tweeting something along the lines of:

Beyonce dated, married, THEN got pregnant. Ladies, take notes.

Perhaps it the was the excitement. Perhaps it was relief.  Maybe it was a little bit of both, but I find this statement to be a bit problematic. While I do believe that Beyonce and Jay-Z’s choice to create a family within the bounds of matrimony is something laudable and something to be proud of, I don’t think that it’s anything new. BlackAndMarriedWithKids.com, anyone? It’s a beautiful thing, and I am happy for them. Yes, they did it “right.” Yes, she is an international superstar and role model for young girls. And yes, traditional, nuclear families are seemingly becoming extinct. But to suggest that ladies should “take notes” because Beyonce is having a baby with her husband seems a bit…I don’t know…EXTRA to me. You don’t have to remind me of the statistics. I already know them. But women everywhere have been doing the same thing forever. Why are we acting brand new? My mother did it “right.” Some of my peers, associates, classmates are doing it “right.” Therefore, I don’t need a superstar like Beyonce to reaffirm the values that I already know and plan to do for me. I know it seems more exciting because it’s “Beyonce,” but what I think we should be doing is celebrating the everyday women who are already doing it or have done it “right.”

What do you think? Are people doing too much by suggesting that women should take note of the “Beyonce Way?” Or, is it a reminder that society needs?

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3 responses »

  1. I’d take it with a grain of salt, mainly because it’s Twitter. So much shade is thrown around on that site in the name of being RTed and “popular” that a lot of what’s said is just for show.

    “what I think we should be doing is celebrating the everyday women who are already doing it or have done it “right.”

    Completely in agreement.

  2. Uh…. Yes everyday women are doing it. But lets face it.. everyday women unfortunately do not have the power to influence millions of young girls who want to do it the Angelina&Brad way. And she’s AFRICAN AMERICAN!!.. Come on! Lets highlight it! How is it ever a “Bit Much” for us to make a big deal about a good decision so that millions of girls will take note and make better choices? I’m not upset, but lets throw water on the fires that NEED to be put out. This is NOT one of them.

    • I totally agree that we should celebrate Beyonce and Jay-Z’s choice to have a child within the bounds of holy matrimony. I never said we should not. However, my problem was with the quote that I mentioned, if you read my article in its entirety. I’m not looking to split hairs on non-issues, but to me, that quote that seemingly went viral in the Twitterverse was problematic…that’s what I considered a “bit much.”

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